i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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