I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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