im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
