it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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