My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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