I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
