Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
