Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
