That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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