when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
