I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I think your dad took our porno
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
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