I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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