you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
