Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
