come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
