Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
