get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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