We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
