belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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