maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
