I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
