Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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