I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Randomize
