Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
