u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She bit a glass in half.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
