Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
