Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
