I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize