Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Randomize
