I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize
