So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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