We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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