I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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