Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
they call him Oral-B. enough said
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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