Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
