do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Randomize
