Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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