well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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