He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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