He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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