So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
