Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
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