i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
