Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
