I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
