I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
