He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize