Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
