That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
