So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
